Watch the Special Feature Mini Music Video – here!
The Big OMG:
Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.
Now I don’t normally be coming up to people on the street like this,
But can I get your autograph?
I know you’re a famous model or something.
My name is OMG
Here’s where I can be reached.
I like romantic comedies
And long walks on the beach.
I like ice cream.
I bet you do too.
But all the ice cream in the world
Isn’t sweeter than you.
I want to take you to my house
And cook you a feast
And take you away
From this hideous beast.
So what you say girl?
Tell me if you wanna know…
The reason why they call me Big O.
[Intro]
What happened to me and my personality?
I blame it on my looks but in reality…
I used to be fun but now I’m just a spoil sport — no.
A killjoy –
uh uh. A bore.
- A drip.
A non participant party pooper!
[V1]
Who came along and stole my funny?
In my mind’s eye it’s never sunny.
Who would ever want to call me honey?
I’ve got let class than a playboy bunny!
[Chorus]
I’ll never be Miss Congeniality.
I can make small talk, I can chat about the weather
even though I hate it as long as we’re together.
Oh I’ll never be Miss Congeniality.
I can lighten up, as light as feather,
whatever you want as long as we’re together.
[V2]
Look what’s happened to me and my mentality.
I blamed it on my friend but in reality,
I used to have a light but now I’m just a shadow.
A winning smile is totally free
So what the heck has happened to me?
I’d rather be a hermit, it’s my specialty.
Am I insane? This is brutality.
[Chorus]
I’ll never be Miss Congeniality.
I can make small talk, I can chat about the weather
even though I hate it as long as we’re together.
Oh I’ll never be Miss Congeniality.
I can lighten up, as light as feather,
whatever you want as long as we’re together.
[Bridge / End]
Saint Ellen Degenerous, hear my plea!
I used to be fun and funny…
Ask my mom, she’d agree!
Music by Anthony R. Bielby
Lyrics by Marilyn Anne Michaels from Episode 8: In The Ring, Part 2
Millie:
I wished for a man, he doesn’t have to be handsome.
But he has good teeth and never asks for a threesome.
He reads me Ulysses while we snuggle in bed.
And though he’s a genius he doesn’t hold it over my head.
Sooze:
You wished for it all, the fairytale and then some.
You compensate for your insecurities, by thinking all blondes are dumb.
You wish my hair to be green and my figure to be stout.
You’re jealous of me, that’s what this is about.
Millie:
Oh, I wished for
Sooze:
You wished for
Millie and Sooze:
The same thing I’ve/You’ve wished for every year of my/your life…
Millie:
An artistic, non-misogynist to make me his domestic partner.
Sooze:
For one of my princes, to make you his dainty little wife!
[V1]
She walks right through the door
and flirts with guys.
I flag down the waiter
and get cheese fries.
She’s out on the dance floor,
I save her seat.
She’s showing off her thighs,
I’m reading Keats.
[Chorus]
Have I become the ugly friend?
What am I to do?
Oh God I’m the ugly friend.
Don’t laugh, it’s true.
[V2]
She asks me out so she’ll look better.
I’m the St. Bernard to her English Setter.
She never brings her money so I always buy her drinks.
I’m the designated driver and it really stinks.
[Bridge]
We stay out late but am I just her alibi?
She runs to second base while I just sit and sigh.
While she’s getting felt up I have to watch her coat.
I’m really popular if you add in double quotes!
[Chorus]
Oh God I’m the ugly friend.
What am I to do?
Someone has to be the ugly friend.
But I wish it was Sooze.
